Archive for May, 2006

Beateseb

Posted in Uncategorized on May 25, 2006 by Avery

Not quite the picture you were expecting is it??

Let me introduce Beateseb, my son’s Betta Fish. (insert can of corn here) We made the trip to Wal-Mart and found out he wanted a “blue fish” Well I’m not buying tropical fish to kill off in a weeks time, I was hoping to get away with the 28 cent goldfish, but he was having nothing to do with that. SO we found the 3 dollar blue bettas, and well here he is. Now the funniest part of this to me is the tank decorations, the package this bright blue plastic glow in the dark seaweed came in was labeled “natural looking” and had instructions on how to best arrange it for the “natural look” I guess if you live in Chernobal this may be “natural” but plants aren’t supposed to be bright blue and glow.

Now my son is very happy with Beateseb, and it has worked to get him dressed both in the morning and at night. I attached the rule to the fish that he was his responsibility to take care of, and he had to feed him twice a day every day, BUT he had to be dressed for the day in the morning to feed him, and dressed for bed at night to feed him. Now instead of the typical arguements and fights to get him ready to go he shows up fully dressed and asking to feed Beateseb. Now mind you it’s only been 2 days, but hey. Since he is the “family pet” now, although he is my son’s, he got stuck with the play on words and is our Betta Fish named Beataseb #1 or “Family”

On the flip side my wife and I decedid we like the thing enough that if it last a few weeks we are buying a red on for our bedroom. His name will be Bararo, or in English “Cockroach” Of course everything in his tank will be the glow in the dark red junk walmart sells…. ugg, I think we are on the road to becoming “fish people”

But don’t fear, we didn’t forget our daughter’s “fish I can eat” My wife decided to ask her just what she meant and we found the exact thing she was talking about!!!!

he was my pet

Posted in Uncategorized on May 23, 2006 by Avery

It’s time for an update on the Beaver family, although every post on here can be construed as an update, there are so many ramblings and tangents and odd places my mind takes us to that it is hardly fare to say that this Blog is a continuous thread on the adoption process.

Hey, I created this Blog on a whim, all I wanted to do was post a comment on my brothers Blog. I had no idea I would become a Blog addict. I had intended on using this Blog to simply update on the adoption, the changes in our family and the ways our world view is changing. Then along the way I get caught up in my half baked soap box moments, and I scream out into the cyber world my frustrations at life in general. But you are here and you are reading this, so you either have way to much free time on your hands, or you enjoy my rants and writings.

To the adoption.

Would it surprise you if I said I know absolutely nothing new? Well that’s not exactly true, I have a actual time line of the events that have taken place on our adoption, I know the order in which they happened, but I have no clue as to what lies in front of us. We could have weeks, we could have months, all we know is we have to wait. According to our agency all of our paperwork has been submitted to MOLSA and most of it is done, but there is a 2 page letter that is only for the Ethiopian government’s use that has to be translated from Amharic into English. Then our paperwork has to be approved and then we can be assigned a court date. Now my friend in Chicago was able to translate a letter from English into Amharic for us to send to the kids in one day, but we are going on 2 weeks on waiting for MOLSA. Sometimes the not knowing what is going on is the hardest part of dealing with it.

The other day my son came up to me and asked if we could move to Ethiopia. He said he misses his brother and sister and he doesn’t like to see his mommy and daddy so sad. His solution was if we moved to Ethiopia we could all live together and be happy. He is a great 4 year old kid. Surprisingly my daughter wasn’t opposed to moving, her only question was “Is God telling us to move to Ethiopia? If He is I’ll be happy.” Yep, she is a great 5 year old too. And then I have to explain to them that we can’t move to Ethiopia because if we did we couldn’t finish the adoption. Well at least I have yet to find an American agency that is willing to do a home study in Ethiopia. If you know of one let me know…….

Off the adoption, because this is just too funny not to share.

We have a problem in our house with Palmetto Bugs, AKA Water Roaches, it’s not a huge problem, just 1 or two crawling around the house per week. We just smash them and throw them away NORMALLY. Unfortunately yesterday morning there was a 2 incher crawling across the beige carpet I had just installed, I was not ready to smash a bug into the carpet quite yet, so I grabbed the closest thing to me, a glass desert bowl, and trapped him underneath. In typical Avery humor I announced to the family that I had just caught the new family pet. Unfortunately my 4 year old son took me seriously and had named him, developed a plan for keeping him, and had decided this was the answer to his very vocal prayer to God for a “Pet he could love”

As you can imagine my wife was less than thrilled at the level of bonding our son had with the roach, and the fact that as I was late for work she was going to have to be the one to transfer the bug to the bug box, once that was found. She did lay the ground rules that he had to stay outside, and I informed him that he looked like an “old roach” and was probably going to die from “old age” soon. He was ok with that.

But the day got worse because his sister decided to play with the bug box and dropped it, opening it and letting the roach free in the front yard. Both kids had a simultaneous meltdown. The daughter, because she knew she screwed up and broke her little brothers heart. The son, because his very, very loved roach got away. They both ran into mommy, hime screaming, “HE WAS MY PET I LOVED HIM SO MUCH!!!!!!” her screaming I DIDN’T MEAN TO IT WAS AN ACCIDENT, I’M SO SORRRRRRRYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!” His solution was that daddy is a good hunter, when he gets home he will be able to find him. The daughter, her solution was that daddy will catch a new one. Mommy, was just relieved it was let loose outside and that that chapter was closed!!!!

So I talked to the kids about it and we decided to buy the son a goldfish. The daughter was a little jealous so I asked her if she wanted a pet fish. After a moment of thought she decided that no, she didn’t want a pet fish, she wanted a fish she could EAT!!!!!

Yeah two peas of a pod they are. Luckily Wal-Mart carries both the edible and frozen variety of fish.

Guess where I’m going tonight.

it’s a mental state of mind

Posted in Uncategorized on May 22, 2006 by Avery

So there was a definite theme this weekend. I arrived home and my dear wife informed me that I was “disturbed” and then proceeded to educate me on why a wall between us and Mexico is a better use of tax dollars than simply stopping the social welfare spending on non Americans. My only answer was that she knew she was marrying an Anarchist when she got on this boat and her republican views don’t quite match mine. Needless to say we don’t spend a lot of time talking politics at our house, it never goes well. But the point of my story is my wife considers me to be a “disturbed” individual in my political views.

On a really cool note, my mothers birthday present shows up, she had bought us a bunch of kites, and a aerobie. I love kite and love the aerobies then to put a cherry on top the really cool airfoil kite is tye dye!!!

So Saturday rolls around, and we do some house cleaning. The entire time I’m trying to get us done because there is a decent breeze and I want to head to the park to fly the kites with the kids. We pick up a “picnic” at Hardees using the 2 for $3 method and they could understand that I wanted 4 burgers, meaning 2 combos. Frustrating times at the drive through. So we finally get to the park and we can’t get the kids kites to fly worth snot, but the big kite flies awesome. Now mind you the wind rating is higher on the big kite but you know how it goes. Eventually we give up on the small kites and put them down in a pile next to our cup and we just all play with the airfoil and the aerobie (who needs a dog, my kids love to play fetch and the further you throw it the happier they are) So we are flying the kite and are a good distance from our pile of stuff and wouldn’t you know it but a gust of wind picks up two to the kites and they start flying on their own across the field. I’m reeling in the kite so my wife takes off after them she was able to catch the ladybug, but the trees got the smiley face kite. It was kind of funny to try to fly that very kite for over an hour with no luck to see it fly and remain in flight tangled in the top of a tree for the rest of the afternoon. So one of our friends shows up for our kids to play together (she is a coworker of mine as well) and she begins to explain to my wife that I am a mental case at work (It’s not my fault when she doesn’t see me enter her cubicle and I scare her enough for her to scream!!!) Well she convinced my wife that I’m nuts.

So we spent my inlaws birthday present at the best restaurant in this town, a small Greek/Lebanese pizza buffet, Milanos — I love that place. The kids were upset the cable was out, but her food is to die for and we all ate much more than we should! The hostess loves my tattoos and we always talk about her getting one, she is too scared to though, and she always says I’m nuts for not minding the pain.

So then we headed to walmart to pick up a few things, and some pictures we had developed (got to love the Walmart online in store pickups for digital pictures) My daughter is the only professional 8×10 we have of our kids but they are all right next to each other and you can’t really tell except for the backgrounds. But as I’m waiting for my wife to show up (we each took one kid and split up so we could get done faster) I got cornered by a dude in a crazy get up explaining to me how he dresses that way to “freak out the religious hypocrites” and how the “hypocrites that work at the mall security asked him to leave the mall.” Some how it was the “Jesus in him that made them uncomfortable” Personally I think it may have been the all black clothing except for the blood splattered cross on his shirt, the shaved head with a scraggly beard pointed into 2 points and the blood shot eyes and the fact that he has no idea what personal space is…….. There are plenty of Goth kids at the mall everyday, but not all of them act like they are going to go postal. Unfortunately I had my daughter with me, and then my wife and son showed up, she saw him a long time before she saw me. She had contemplated just bypassing the entire area but then she saw I was cornered by eh dude, and was trying to be nice to the kid (It all started because he liked my shirt) I finally got myself away from him and my wife reiterated that I was nuts, all I could tell her is I was sane in comparison.

So Sunday rolls around and the sermon at church was all about following God’s call even when it doesn’t make sense. It was all a set up for the assciate pastor to say he was moving to Georgia to be a part of a church plant down there, but the pastor was using examples from the congregation. He sentence was something of the nature: “Many of you look at Avery and Heather and say they are nuts.” Well the peanut gallery all chipped in with “Just Avery,” “Amen,” “”Heather’s not.” Well it look a minute or so, but the general consensus of the entire church is I’m nuts. Of course his point was kind of lost to the peanut gallery but it was about following God’s call for us to go 1/2 around the world and adopt 2 kids we have never met, nor could we afford the adoption when we started. But what did people leave with, Avery is nuts.

So we had a bunch of free tickets to go see the Mudcats (minor league baseball) and I took in a bag a gourmet Jelly Belly Jelly Beans for the kids to snack on. I love those things, and they were free! Well each of my kids informed me that something was wrong with me because they tasted terrible. They inherited their mother’s taste buds!!!! Jelly Bellies are awesome, hey I’m happy, it means I get them all.

SO it was a busy weekend, one that I was continually reaffirmed that the social workers messed up in approving me, but I’m happy and that’s what matters.

Oh yeah, and then to top off the weekend we found out we have been saying our son’s name wrong for the last 8 months……. We received a DVD where we actually get to see our kids playing and talking and interacting with other kids, it was very cute, and very much a boost to our spirits, but we learned we had used a short e where there should have been a long e, now we have to reeducate everybody…. fun, fun, fun (and the family already thought we didn’t know what we were doing)

a little of this a little of that

Posted in Uncategorized on May 19, 2006 by Avery

So I survived turning 30. Nothing super exciting to report on that front, I had really thought my kids would be home before I turned 30, but they aren’t and it doesn’t look like they will be here before the fall. For my birthday my kids got me a small old Ethiopian flag and an American Flag, they are on teh piano in my Catawba flower vase behind the photos of all 4 of my kids. I really like having 4 8×10’s of all my kids where I can see them, I wish I could actually physically see 2 of my kids, but I digress.

Heather revamped the Ethiopian Barbie.

She is making this model of the Barbie to sell. $25 plus S&H, contact me if you are interested in one. This is basically what you are buying except there is a silver cross on the necklace and heather has figured out how to braid the hair with a litlle more Ethiopian flare to it. This doll in particualr has found a ticket to Ethiopia. She is traveling with the Enat when she goes to get Desta. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

I found a blog I had lost for a while this week, Meskal Square. I love this guy, you actually get to get a ferenji’s view of the inside of Ethiopia and the news of what is currently happening there. It’s a must read and keep reading if you are adopting out of Ethiopia.

So is anyone as confused onthe illegal immigrants as I am? See for my heritage you are all illegals. My people were here long before you whiteys showed up……

Really you have to look at it and admire their American spirit, they came to a land that doesn’t want them. Imposed their will on a people that doesn’t like them, and are attempting to follow the American vision of creating laws that enforce their ideologies over the indigenous people of the land. Yep, America has gone down this road before, like I said, just ask my people. You can find them on a small reservation in Rock Hill, SC. Just like the immigrants have succesfully removed English from the areas they have taken over, there is not one person alive today that can fluently speak my peoples language. There is no one that remembers practicing the old ways, and I have yet to meet a single person who can tell me what the war paint actually looked like, we just have one small reference in one historical writing describing our paint, and no one can make any sense out of it. I say kudos to the illegals. I don’t want to have to pick my own cotton, harvest my own tobacco, or pay the prices for food that was harvested by people paid a fair salary. But I’m against building the wall. I’m for war, taking over Mexico, and while we are at it lets get rid of Canada. We can build a wall around Quebec and introduce a new police state — I miss the old Australia.

Turning 30

Posted in Uncategorized on May 17, 2006 by Avery

Well I turned 30 today.

What else is there to say.

the ban has lifted

Posted in Uncategorized on May 15, 2006 by Avery

Yeah haw, the ban has lifted. Due to the crazy response we have gotten over Ethiopia Barbie I can now introduce my wife of 7 years, Heather.

So this is her in the Ethiopian Dress given to her by our dear Ethiopian friend from Chicago.

This adoption has been one crazy story after another, you wouldn’t believe the contacts and friends we’ve made on this journey if we tried to tell you. We don’t believe it ourselves, and yet here we are with some of the neatest and dearest people on earth who we are now privileged to call friend.

So let’s talk about the actual dress itself today, there is quite the funny story from just last week in fact.

Both my wife and myself have degrees in Secondary Education, my wife taught for 1 year before being promoted to Mom. I never used my degree and would have to cut my salary in half to start. But my wife really enjoys teaching and kids. So she has volunteered over the year to come into our daughters school and do “workshops” on Ethiopia. Well last week she decided she would tackle our daughter’s kindergarten class and come in every day to teach a short lesson on Ethiopia. And every day she wore her dress as to “authenticate” the experience for the little imps.

So on day one Heather gets to the school and is very warmly received by almost everyone. The was one female teacher that decided her “education” was better than Heather’s and got into and argument about how Heather was wearing a beautiful Kente cloth dress. Heather attempted to explain that her dress was bought in Ethiopia and made by Ethiopians, and that Kente cloth was from Ghana, but that didn’t seem to work. I don’t know why it is that people think that in a continent the size of Africa there is only one culture. And why people mix and match west Africa culture with east Africa culture. I’m going to start my own American centric world view of painting Cowboys running the old southern plantations. And let’s paint a picture of the Boston Tea Party being done by the indigenous American Indian tribes. As one from Catawba heritage I’ve gotten somewhat desensitized to American lumping every Indian group under one banner, the Hollywood banner, but I guess I thought people would think just a little bit more when talking about a culture that you are totally separated from. At least I would think you wouldn’t try to pass yourself off as an expert, or smarter than a person with a 4 year degree that has specialized in African culture just because you have more melanin in your skin. Yes, that’s right the argument can really be boiled down tot he fact that this black teacher refused to admit that this white stay at home mom may know more about Africa than she thinks she does.

So we roll on, and the week continues. Well to back story a bit, my daughter has worn a necklace we made for her for at least the last year. It’s a small bead necklace with the colors of the Ethiopian flag on it. She wears the necklace with great pride and if you ask her about it she tells you she wears it to remind herself to pray for her brother and sister, and that she will wear it until they come home. Now that is a 5 year old I can be proud of! As you can imagine though it has been noticed by the other kids in the school and she has been bullied and told to take it off, or give it to the bullies on several occasions. She has always stood her ground, she is a big kid and doesn’t take anyone’s flack, but last week one of her good friends asked if she could wear it for the day. My daughter was very distraught on this one, as here was a girl she really liked, and she wanted to share, but just not this necklace. So I decide to step in and fix the problem. I made her friend a necklace. Then she comes home and says another girl in the class stole it from the girl she gave it too. After calling some parents, and talking to some kids we get the necklace back to who it was meant for, but I discover I have alienated my daughter by only sending one necklace for a tight nit group of girls. So I ask my daughter who else she wants to give a necklace to. She gives me a few names, 2 I think, but they are only the white friends. She is friends with the black girls in her class, and I don’t want to cause any race related issues in the group dynamic so I ask her if she has any of her black friends that she would like to give a necklace too. All of a sudden I have volunteered myself to make a necklace for every kid in her class. that’s 23 necklaces. And then I proceeded to forget about it until Thursday night, the day before I told her they would be done. That’s when I discovered we were out of beads and I needed to run to the store that was closing to get supplies. I didn’t find what we needed, but luckily Wal-Mart is 24 hours and they had some beads that would work. Heather and I staid up until 2 am making the dumb things!!!!! My substitute beads worked out to the very last bead. I used the last of the greens on the last necklace I made. But they all got done and all the kids loved their Ethiopian necklaces. Of course I was too dead tired to care.

So Heather goes in for the last day of teaching the kids. The day goes fine, she even gets the kids to participate in an Ethiopian coffee ceremony with decaff coffee. The kids hated the taste but loved the experience, and they all drank the first of their 3 cups. They were all proud of themselves for not complaining until Heather told them they had to drink 3!!!!!! She let them off the hook though.

So on her way home she decides to kill 2 birds with one stone and decides to do her grocery shopping. All of a sudden Heather was very, very aware of just how much she stuck out dressed in this tradition Ethiopian attire in the middle of this southern fried hick town in the middle of Food Lion. The only people to speak to her were those that said how beautiful the dress was, but even those spent too much time staring at my poor shy wife. I so wish I would have been there, but I would have just made it worse and would have drawn more attention to her, not less. I’m going to get her to do it again for me, but only so I can follow her around with the camera and get the reactions of the people around her. I think we’ll use the mall for that though………….

Ethiopia Barbie

Posted in Uncategorized on May 11, 2006 by Avery

She just may be the world’s first Ethiopian Barbie. After searching the vast reaches of cyberspace we have determined that Barbie is a very “white privelege” toy. If you want a ethnic barbie you may find a caucasion features Barbie with some dark skin, or you can pay $300 for a designer Barbie that actually has ethnic features. There appears to be a few Barbies that have been released over time that actually have “black” hair, now try to actually find one at a department store. I guess in teh Barbie world everybody uses relaxers in their hair? To give them credit though, in the line of Barbie’s that we found this one there was a Ken with a fro. My awesome wife took this Beach Barbie with very straight hair and turned her into what you see before you now.

This is how the Ethiopian Barbie began. We purchased her for about $5 from Walmart hoping that the kinks you see in her hair where in all of her hair. Guess what? It’s not.

Actually we spent the first few minutes trying to decide if this Barbie was actually black, had a bad tan, or was supposed to be racially ambigous. But she was the blackest Barbie dall we could find at any department store so she was going to have to do.

It’s worth noting here that this is also the only Barbie in the beach line to have a tattoo. Luckily the tattoo is around her belly button so it doesn’t show in her transformation.

No, I can’t even braid my daughters hair and have it look good, she calls my hair styles her “daddy hair” normally when she has “daddy hair” she runs to mommy to get it fixed before anyone sees. But I did watch my wife braid the dolls head, it didn’t look any fun to me.


Now Barbie is really “Christie” here. And I discovered in looking for a photo of the original Barbie in the box that she is Barbie’s first black freind. It seems as if over the years she has had a lot of plastic surgury but this is the 2005 model, who knows what the future holds.

Her neckalce was the only peice of the outfit that I created, it’s a leather shoelace cut in half with a crimping bead for the silver peice. This signifies her as a good Orthodox Barbie, she’s been baptised and everything. Super glue is holding it together so hopefully it will last a while.

The dress is a cheesecloth like material, it’s very close to the actual cloth made in Ethiopia. I would post a picture of my wife in her Ethiopian dress but she has banned me from even using her name out here on what she call a nacisistic diary.

The bracelet is the same design as what we made for the kids and the necklaces that we wear. It has the beads with red – white – and blue, and the beads with red- yellow – and green. America and Ethiopia, two cultures that will be forever blended in our family.


She is also wearing traditional style silver anclets. I guess she is from an affluent family in Ethiopia.

We made the doll to send to Ethiopia for our daughter to play with, we don’t know when we will be able to send it as we have to wait on the next set of families to travel to the home to pick up their kids. Hopefully we will be in the next set but we don’t know.

We are looking to find a Barbie out there with a reasonable price tag with ethnic hair. Our daughter is going to have a family of fine straight haired people, the least we can do is give her some dolls that look like she does. Does anyone know of a Barbie knock off that they let they don’t use relaxers in the hair?

I know the humor factor in this post has been low, sorry about that. I had a really funny post with all of these pictures but my stupid computer lost the post so you are getting this one, it’s fast and dirty but it’s out here and you can see the labor of love my wife created for our new daughter.